3AM- College house party. Things are winding down.
Time to get down to business. Time to find a comfortable place to sleep. There must be at least seven of us, dealing with the same issue. Scrambling to stake claims on couches, floor real estate, and coveted beds (invite only).
An open couch! It’s too good to be true. I make my way over, trying not to draw attention to myself. However, I am not alone. A challenger meets me at the couch. His intentions clear. We size up the situation in spaghetti-western stare down style.
“Rock-Paper-Scissors. Best of three.” he states, as though it were law.
The contender inside takes over, “One game. Winner takes all.” Deaf with blood thirst, he ignores my conditions and begins gesturing his fist in an up-and-down motion, beckoning my own to oppose it.
“Rock. Paper. Scissors.” Fists fall. Damage dealt. A mighty stone obliterates my scissors.
“Rock. Paper. Scissors.” a small, gathering, crowd chants in unison. This time he makes the mistake of playing a paper. Sticking to my guns, I play another pair of scissors, splitting his paper like Moses to the Red Sea.
The crowd howls in upset. And two warriors remain focused, locked in the timeless battle between Rock, Paper, and Scissors.
“Rock. Paper. Scissors.” Que slow motion. The fists begin their final descent. -This is for the win. The couch. The glory. At this moment, in a flash of tactical genius, I realize he opened with Rock, and any seasoned Rock-Paper-Scissors contender knows Rock is for rookies. He must think I’m going with a triple scissor game plan, so he’s going to fall back on his Rock. I know it- The fists thunderously crash to earth. Two meteorites with the destructive power to wipe out a species of flying sharks.
The smoke settles.
Just as I predicted! Rock. I unfold my triumphant scroll. “Victory” emblazons itself in shimmering, liquid-gold across my champion’s manuscript, while dark horsemen of defeat trample across my opponent’s face.
The crowd releases a final climactic roar before dispersing into the night. The lad accepts his defeat with sport, taking the floor beside the coveted couch as I accept my thrown. We talk into the night, fondly exchanging notes on the heated bout.
We learned something that night. Rock-Paper-Scissors is not merely a light hearted game of chance, but an explosive last resort resolution reserved for only the gravest disputes.
That was entertaining
I was amused
You certainly turned a 20 second experience into a epic tale. Well done.
-Adam
that was hella impress factor